Saturday, January 13, 2007

Political Commentary Made Easy

A buddy of mine joked recently that these BushCo people are making me look like a genius. I got a good laugh out of that one but I'm here to tell you that it just ain't so. It's not them and I'm not a genius or an insider. The truth is that I simply have a fool-proof method for dead-on-balls accurate political punditocritizin' and, for a limited time, I'm willing to share my secrets with the general public.

My simple step-by-step method is guaranteed to make anyone, from any walk of life, a reliable and credible political pundit virtually instantly. Just follow these quick and easy steps:

Step #1: Listen to or read a statement from President Bush, anyone in his administration or any of their supporters in congress or the media, making careful note of their arguments and assertions.

Step #2: Assume the exact opposite to be true.

Step #3: Tell all your friends that exact opposite formulation as if it were a confirmed fact while -- and this important -- actually having no factual idea yourself. Write scalding letters to the editor sticking your neck out on these assertions. Post it in your blog if you have one. If you don't have one, start one and post it there. Accost strangers on the elevator with it. Go nuts.

Step #4: NOW (and only now) go do some research.

Step #5: Find out you were right. Laugh about it. Show your spouse or significant other.

I'm batting a thousand with this amazing system and now you can too! Be a hit at dinner parties! Amaze your friends!